Good Friday

"Surrender to death, to start a new life."

-Fr John Unni

He said to "surrender to death...stop fighting...surrender." Now there are a number of ways this could be taken. Obviously, Fr. John did not mean this literally, but metaphorically. Even so, I am not sure what part of my life needs to die. If anything I need to live more. Maybe my nonexporatory side and my worries need to die. Perhaps, my current job needs to "die" so I can "live" with a new job. I've already decided that giving up on my dream to be a doctor is NOT the one to die. I have worked way too hard to give that up now. Yeah, the worries got to go and the "que sera sera" part of me needs to be revived...brought back from the dead. That's how my life can be improved. Drop all the pretentiousness, all the pride, all the doubt, and just be.

Random questions about Good Friday:

1. Why is it called Good Friday, when this is the day that we rejected the Lord, and condemned him to a crucifixion?
2. Why does Daddy eat that bland mung bean soup only on this day?
3. Although I fasted all day, is it ok that I gorged myself with a delicious non-meat Cheesecake Factory dish for dinner? This is probably why Daddy eats the mung bean soup. So he can't feel guilty about his Good Friday meal.
4. Is there an official age when you should start fasting?

Anyway, I was thinking of boiling some eggs and painting them on Easter with Carlos. But how many do I boil? And who will eat all of them? I LOVE boiled eggs, but all those yolks will clog up my arteries. Maybe I'll just paint eggs on paper instead. It's a nice compromise. Too bad I don't have kids for egg hunting. Then when they come back with a basket of eggs in exchange for money or prizes, I tell them that they have to eat all the eggs before they can get their money. Lol, remember when they used to do that to us?

Happy Peeps eating!

Work

Bleh...yesterday I was so bored at work. I had things to do but I had no urge to do any of it. I need a new stimulating job. It's really too bad that I plan to stay her another 5 freakin months! I hope they go by quickly. All for the sake of getting a good rec letter.

Well, this hasn't been a total waste of time. By working at this job:

1. I'm gonna get my first paper published ever! Let alone, be first author! *keep your fingers crossed, that it gets accepted to the journal* I might even have a second one coming out, as well as be second author on my co-worker's paper.
2. I've learned how to deal with a difficult boss. Unfortunately, mine is so difficult that it took me a whole year to really know how to work with her.
3. I've learned a lot about the Chinese culture and the joys of motherhood through my co-worker. She has really become my closest friend in Boston (after Carlos of course). Although I don't like the pressure she gives me about having a baby sooner than later. I don't have the money or the maturity to support a child!
4. I get a cake for my birthday and I get to indulge in my co-workers' birthday cakes too.
5. I've learned that research is only fun when I get to think of my projects and develop them myself.
6. Research is only fun when you have enough funds to do it.
7. I've gotten over some fears, i.e. holding big-arse bullfrogs and rats.
8. I've learned that guinea pigs are so cute! (Why do we have to use them in experiments?)
9. Learned completely new (to me, but ancient) techniques.
10. Got to work with summer students - totally fun and exhausting

I guess that's all I can say about my past year and a seven months of working in this lab. Not too bad.

Anyway, I totally need a new job. I don't want to do research anymore, but it's the only thing I know how to do. If I apply for any other job, they require experience and crap that I don't have. Job searching is gonna be fun (in a uber-sarcastic voice). I hope that in my next job, I'll be able to talk to people outside of my co-workers, and make a positive influence on others' lives.

Now, where do I look? Let the hunt begin!...in June. =)